Voici le blague, version anglais:
« Apres avoir chosi l’anglais comme la langue prefere dans le EU, le parlement European a commissioner un etude de faisabilite dans les facons d’ameliorer l’efficacite dans communications parmi les departments gouvernementals.
Les Officiels Europeans a dit que English spelling is unnecessarily difficult. (que L’orthograph d’anglais est trop difficile) Par exemple: meme son mais l’orthographe different: here & hear, bow & bough, through & thorough.
Ce que est clair, c’est qu’on a besoin d’une programme des changes a fixer ces problemes.
Le programme serait administre par un comite de top-level (niveau haut?) personnel choisi par tout les pays differents.
Dans la premiere annee, par exemple, le comite peut proposer le utilisation de ‘s’ pour le ‘c’ douce.
Sertainly, sivil servants in all sities would resieve this news with joy. The hard ‘c’ (‘c’ dur) could then be replased by ‘k’ sinse both letters are pronounsed alike.
This would not only klear up konfusion in the minds of klerikal workers, but typewriters and keyboards kould be made with one less letter, a signifikant saving.
In the second year, bekause of growing enthusiasm, it kould be announsed that the troublesome ‘ph’ would henseforth be written ‘f’. This would make words like ‘fotograf’ twenty persent shorter in print.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reash the stage where more komplikated shanges are possible. Governments would enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
We would al agre that the horible mes of silent ‘e’s’ in the languag is disgrasful. Therefor, we kould drop thes and kontinu to read and writ as though nothing had hapend.
By this time it would be 4 years sins the skem began and people would be reseptiv to steps sush as replasing ‘th’ by ‘z’. Perhaps zen ze funktion of ‘w’ kould be taken on by ‘v’, vitsh is, after al, half a ‘w’.
Finaly, ze unesesary ‘o’ kuld be dropd from vords kontaining ‘ou’. Similar arguments vud of kors be aplid to ozer konbinations of leters. Kontinuing ziz proses yer aftr yer, ve vud eventuli hav a reli sensibl riten stil.
Aftr tventi yers zer vud be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrion vud fin it ezi tu enderstan esh ozer. Ze drems of ze EU vud finali kum tru.
Ve kud finali understan esh ozer.
***Explicatons de plus pour ceux qui sont encore perdu…
L’E.U. voudrait faire changer de langue anglais pour que il devenir plus simple pour toutes les Europeans….
Annee 1: Beaucoup des mots anglais avait le son exactement le meme, mais ils sont ecrit plutot different – par exemple: here, hear, there, their, they’re, pair, pear, through, threw….etc etc.
Change 1: utilise ‘s’ pour ‘c’.
Change 2: change cet ‘c’ pour un ‘k’
Et mieux, on a puis besoin de 1 lettre de moins sur les machines a ecrire…
Annee 2: changer le probleme ‘ph’ pour un ‘f’. C’est plus court aussi.
Annee 3: les doubles “ll” “cc” “rr” seront maintenant singulier.
Aussi, les ‘e’s’ que sont muets, seront supprime.
Annee 4: changer les “th” pour “z”
Changer les “W” pour “v” (apres tout, le « v » est un demi-W, n’est ce pas?)
Avec “ou” – supprimer le ‘o’
Annee 20: Maintenant, il n’ya pas encore des problemes, tout le monde peuvent comprendre les autres facilement…. Les reves de l’E.U. a devenu finalement une realite!
Pour moi, maintenant ce ‘nouveau langue’ semble comme l’allemand! C’est drole et bizarre! Comme un retour au racines allemand pour la langue d’anglais!
Les derniers lignes etait trop difficile, donc, voici le traduction en vraie anglais
… »We would all agree that the mess of silent « e’s » in the language is disgraceful, therefore we would drop these and continue to read and write as though nothing had happened.
By this time, it would be 4 years since the scheme began and people would be receptive to steps such as replacing ‘th’ by ‘z’. Perhaps then the function of « W » could be taken on by « V », which is, after all, 1/2 a « W ».
Finally, the unnecessary ‘o’ could be dropped from words containing ‘ou’. Similar arguments would of course be applied to other combinations of letters. Continuing this process, year after year, we would eventually have a really sensible written style.
After 20 years, there would be no more trouble or difficulties and everyone would find it easy to understand each other. The dreams of the E.U. would finally come true. We could finally understand each other.!!!
Moral of the story: without order, chaos results 😆
Kate 😀
, le il y a 18 années et 10 mois.
